There are times when Murphy’s Law quietly makes its presence known.
A dropped piece of toast lands butter-side down. The washing machine eats a sock. Something you urgently need disappears moments before you need it.
Then there are times when Murphy checks the calendar, notices that induction day is approaching, and decides to personally disable the entire family transport fleet.
That is roughly where we find ourselves today.
It Started With a Starter Motor
The first sign of trouble arrived on 31 July, when the starter motor in our 2009 Kia Grand Carnival officially resigned from its position within the vehicle.
With approximately 311,000 kilometres behind it, our 2009 Kia Grand Carnival has accumulated quite a maintenance history over the years. A failed starter motor was inconvenient, but it was also a reasonably straightforward problem to identify.
The replacement process came with a complication of its own.
The starter motor that came out of the Carnival had a 10-tooth drive. The replacement starter motor had an 8-tooth drive.
Because apparently even replacing a clearly failed component cannot happen without Murphy adding a small mystery to the job.
The replacement went in, the Carnival started and, strangely enough, it now sounds quieter while starting than it did before.
We could have accepted that as the conclusion of the matter.
Murphy considered it an opening act.
The Carnival Continues Its Resignation Process
Not long after the starter motor was replaced, the Carnival developed two more significant problems at the same time.
The first problem announced itself through the brakes.
The brake pedal became unusually hard to push, stopping the vehicle required considerably more effort than it should, and a constant hissing sound could be heard from inside the cabin whenever the pedal was pressed.
After working through several checks, the evidence pointed rather decisively towards a failed brake booster.
That would have been enough excitement on its own.
Unfortunately, the Carnival’s torque converter also appears to have developed ideas of its own.
Once the vehicle warms up, it continues trying to drive forward while stopped. It shudders, threatens to stall and requires shifting into Neutral to settle it down.
This is not ideal behaviour from any vehicle, but it becomes particularly inconvenient when that vehicle is supposed to help transport a rather large family to and from hospital in the immediate future.
We have therefore reached the reasonably confident conclusion that the Carnival is suffering from two simultaneous faults: a failed brake booster and a separate torque-converter issue.
Excellent timing.
Surely the LandCruiser Will Behave
Fortunately, the Carnival is not our only vehicle.
My work truck is an 80 Series LandCruiser. It is big, tough and generally willing to keep moving despite whatever life throws at it.
Naturally, Murphy noticed that too.
The LandCruiser’s contribution began with not one, but two flat tyres.
Apparently, one flat tyre would have been an inconvenience. Two flat tyres demonstrated commitment.
Then we discovered that rats had been enjoying a light snack beneath the bonnet. Of all the possible food sources available to them, they had selected automotive wiring.
Perhaps copper has nutritional benefits of which I am unaware.
Once the local rodent population had completed its electrical work, the indicator relay decided that it had also done enough indicating for one lifetime and promptly packed it in.
At this point, the LandCruiser had endured two flat tyres, rat-chewed wiring and a failed indicator relay.
Surely that would be enough.
Murphy disagreed.
Another Starter Motor Joins the Protest
Today, with induction only two days away, the LandCruiser’s starter motor decided that it would also like to resign from its position.
The key was turned.
The truck refused to start.
This was not an acceptable response.
Fortunately, D1 was available to conduct negotiations.
These negotiations involved a tyre iron.
After a short but firm conversation between the Tyre Iron of D1 and the starter motor, the LandCruiser reconsidered its position and returned to work.
Some people refer to this as striking the starter motor to temporarily free a sticking internal component.
We prefer to think of it as mechanical conflict resolution.
The important point is that the truck started, although its starter motor is now very clearly on notice.
There is also something almost poetic about the situation.
Murphy began this entire sequence with the starter motor in the Carnival. Now, two days before induction, he has returned to where he began and turned his attention to the starter motor in the LandCruiser.
Apparently, he enjoys a story with symmetry.
Murphy’s Pre-Induction Checklist
With only two days remaining until our Bubbas’ induction day, our recent transport history can be summarised as follows:
- One resigned Carnival starter motor
- One replacement starter motor with two fewer teeth
- One failed Carnival brake booster
- One separate Carnival torque-converter problem
- Two flat LandCruiser tyres
- Rat-chewed LandCruiser wiring
- One failed indicator relay
- One temperamental LandCruiser starter motor
- One tyre iron with a proven record in mechanical negotiations
- Absolutely impeccable timing
Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.
Preferably all at once.
Preferably immediately before an important event.
Two Days to Go
There is something almost impressive about the precision of it all.
These vehicles have had months in which to misbehave. They could have spread their problems out politely over several weeks. They could have waited until after the hospital trips were completed and everyone was safely back at home.
Instead, they appear to have coordinated their industrial action for the final days before induction.
The Carnival has made its demands.
The LandCruiser has submitted its list of grievances.
The rats have contributed their unsolicited modifications.
D1 has responded with a tyre iron.
For the next two days, we would sincerely appreciate it if every remaining mechanical, electrical and rubber component in both vehicles could simply continue performing its assigned function.
There is no need for initiative.
There is no need for further surprises.
Just start, steer, indicate, stop and keep the air inside the tyres.
That is all we ask.
Murphy has already had his turn.
Induction Day belongs to the Next Generation.